When I started this blog it was with a commitment to myself. That commitment was to write an entry every single night (hence the name).

Last night I failed. Slumber took me before I could get the words out. Truth be told, I was struggling to find the words anyway, but sleep got me before I quit.

At least that’s what I told myself. That’s the excuse I used. That’s what got me off the hook.

This morning I woke up feeling frustrated with myself. I had failed. I had a simple task and I couldn’t even do that, so how could I possibly hope to do anything properly, ever?

Such a defeatist attitude, and also quite a convenient one. Why bother trying, just keep doing “enough”. Why bother setting yourself up to fail? Instead, how about just don’t even start?

It’s easy to fall into the trap of obstacles. If we can gain perspective and see the obstacles for the illusions they really are, we can begin to get somewhere better. Somewhere worthwhile. Somewhere we belong.

It’s getting past the obstacles that can be tricky, because believe it or not, YOU are the one who is responsible for creating the obstacles in the first place. You make excuses, you blame other people and other situations and you fail to take responsibility for the fact that you are more terrified of your own success than of your own failure.

If you fail, nothing changes. Your life looks the same. The old rules remain, and the patterns you know off by heart continue to rule your world. Failure is the safe bet.

But what if you succeed? What then?

Success brings enormous change, and a different aspect to a familiar world. It brings new challenges and new rules, and (scariest of all) it brings the unknown.

We must learn to own our failures and see them for what they are – lessons disguised in a riddle of experience.

If you feel you have “let yourself down”, get over it. It doesn’t matter unless you let it matter. A bad day or a failed task is not a worthy excuse to give up on yourself.

There is no worthy excuse.

Start over, over and over again. Keep going, regardless of the excuses you try to fabricate. Remember to embrace the obstacles and the challenges that come your way for they add colour to your story and force you to evolve.

At the end of the day, it won’t matter to anyone but you.

But you matter more than anyone else.

Make yourself proud and do what you need to do.